Four Years Later: Alcohol and Drugs

I refuse to drink. I made that vow an incredibly long time ago, and I stick by it. Growing up, I've been around alcohol my whole life. I've seen the way it corrupts people and changes them, and I don't like it. Both of my parents are at the very least borderline alcoholics, but I suspect it could be considered full-fledged. It's gotten to the point where they drink and one can barely notice a change in the way they act. I don't want to be like my parents. I never have. I'm afraid that if I were to consume alcohol, I might get addicted, like them.

I remember the fear that I once had about drinking. My parents are still basically at the same point in their life, and unfortunately, even though all of their kids are now of college age, it still has a major effect on our lives. I know now that my fear came from experiencing my  parents, but I also now realize that my judgment on the use of alcohol reflected only my knowledge based on my family. I broke the oath that I made not even a year after originally writing this post. I was in a bad way, and a good friend offered me a drink, so I took it. Rum. It wasn't bad. It made me feel warm inside, and it didn't have any negative side effects. Soon after the first realization that it wasn't completely bad, I kept occasionally trying alcohol in small quantities. A little vodka with my roommate and a friend. An occasional beer. I found drinks I liked and those I didn't, and I realized that in moderation, there was nothing wrong with alcohol at all.

Why would I drink, anyway? I don't see any good reason to. It wouldn't make me happy. I don't want to forget anything. It could only cause me trouble. Sure, I go to a school where alcohol is pretty much the main feature, but I'm not going to be tempted to drink. Frankly, I'm pretty sure I'm more fun sober than most people I know drunk.

Drinking makes me happy when I'm in a social atmosphere. I've also found that drinking makes me feel good when I am upset. I enjoy getting drunk be it helps me escape this horribly overwhelming sense of responsibility I have. I'm not at H-SC anymore, and I don't socialize at Hollins because I'm only ever there twice a week, so I don't get to drink often. I do enjoy it, though. And it still hasn't caused trouble.

This post is seeming like more of a rant, but whatever. I just wont drink. Don't make fun of me for it. Don't try to pressure me to drink.

Ooops.

Drugs, I likewise refuse to touch. Why waste my life with them? I don't need something to make me happy or alter my thoughts. There have been times where I thought that might be easier, but not anymore. I have never tried any illegal drug. I've never had alcohol. This doesn't mean I don't try new things, it just means I don't like doing stupid things to my body.

I still feel the same way about drugs, but I'm also more lenient on my judgment of them. After all, if my opinion on alcohol changed so dramatically, couldn't my opinion on drugs? I actually support the legalization of marijuana right now, despite the fact that I don't want to try it, and I've often found myself considering what it would be like to use perception-altering drugs, but I still believe it would be a bad idea to try them.

One last thing, I don't really like being around people when they drink or use drugs. I don't care if you do it, though I'd prefer you didn't. Just don't do it around me. I think that's it. TTYL.

Here I am, talking to you later. My impressions have changed, as impressions are likely to do over time, and I am a different man than I was four years ago. I no longer mind being around people who are drinking, but I still prefer to avoid drug use. I do think that I am more open-minded now than I used to be, and I think that that is certainly something to behold.